That Guy That Reminds You of That Guy You Know

i feel like i need to post on Tumblr while i sit here with my Alexi Murdoch and my coffee.  Because if i’m going to be a hipster bitch, I might as well live up to all of it. 

Today’s topic:  Everyone around me is fucking out of their minds.

Over the last few weeks, I can’t help but notice that almost everyone around me is falling apart.  People cry like…daily.  Everyone’s super stressed and on their last nerve.  And like, I get it.  You’re busy.  We’re all busy.  We’re all dealing with the same absurd amount of work.

But when times like these happen, I’m usually at my calmest.  You know why?  Because you just gotta sit back and know that you’re going to do it all, and the less time you spend bitching, the faster you can move on with your life.

There is just so much negativity and unneeded anxiety exuding from people.  When we have Voice for the Stage and three (THREE?!) people cry in one class period…like…what?  I’m all about releasing your inner frustrations (I’m doing it now), but people are stressing about the complete wrong things. 

We go to school for theatre.  People are dying all over the world.  We have it pretty fucking good.  So you had a bad showing, so you forgot your lines, so you’re worried about getting redirected…SO WHAT.  You’re alive.  be happy about that. 

I just want people to realize that YOU are the only person who has control of your life.  Yes, things happen, but it’s how you deal with it.  As I drunkenly texted someone the other night:  we’re all broken.  it’s how you decide to put the pieces back together that matters.

Because I love ya’ll.  But I’m done with people not realizing just how much else there is going on in the world than in our theatre classes.  I’m done with the passive aggressive comments, the shutting yourself off from the world when something goes poorly, and the general negative vibes than run rampant here. the only person that’s holding you back is yourself.

sigh.  I’m going to london.

it’s only when you let go of everything that you’re free to do anything.

The usual first sentence:  I never ever update my tumblr.

Imma keep this short and sweet.  If you let your hectic and crazy life make YOU hectic and crazy, you won’t survive.  Enjoy the little things in life and do whatever you can to enjoy every second.

In 6 days, I’ll have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 7 months. I’m gay and stuff.  That happened.  And I’m the most happy about it, I’m out, blah blah blah.  It’s nice to not even worry about it anymore.  this is my first time publicly just writing that, which is pretty cool.  my whole family and everyone knows.  it’s pretty awesome.

I’m really fucking happy.  I look back at my old tumblr posts and see how unbelievably lost and confused I was, and I see people around me constantly posting similarly sad things and all I can say is that YOU are the beginning of the change in your life.  If you’re unhappy, do something about it, cause there’s no time to waste.

In terms of my goals…I met like half.  Disney World didn’t happen, which is real upsetting.  but, I’m getting ready to go to london for a semester, i’m in just the best relationship I could have ever asked for, and i love what i do. 

So yeah.  see ya’ll in a few months.

milkshakebringsalldaboys:

-everysecond:

omg im crying

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

omg he’s so angry

ahahahahah i don’t know why this made me laugh so hard

(via neeenyaledonio)

1) DON’T GET SICK, DAMMIT

2) NO ARMHOLES EITHER

3) work out on a consistent basis (something i actually did last semester…until i got sick and had an armhole)

4) sleep

5) set aside at least 43 minutes a day to watch a TV show on DVD for my own mental sanity

6) get through ADS2

7) pass my dance hurdle (lolz)

8) learn my voice rep sooner than the week before juries for once

9) hang all the stuff on my walls that i have yet to hang (read:  everything)

10) clean out whatever is living under my bed

11) play the guitar more (so me and Adam can start our band)

12) go to Disney World over Spring Break (this is happening)

13) make swimming a real hobby and not something i do for 2 weeks then hospitalize myself

14) spend less time staying up late on facebook (lets be honest…)

15) eat healthy lunches so i can pig out on dinner…and not both

16) record music for my mom (she’s funny like that)

17) organize all the shit that accumulates on my floor

18) do my laundry more consistently so i don’t end up in sweatpants every day

19) survive tuesdays and thursdays (they suck.)

20) be more involved in Delta Sig

21) get off campus more (again, for my own sanity)

22) become best friends with Jan (LOVE ME)

23) just something about midwest auditions can go here

24) actually apply for summer internships and stuff (errr)

25) end this semester has happy as i am now before London :-)

really…of all of these, the only ones that i think will actually happen are Disney and the last one.  but i mean, that’s pretty good in my opinion

Bonus:  make more lists

kayliehonksalot:

knarfydna:

Last year in my apartment at school we started something really cool.  Whenever we had people over (which was pretty regularly) we would have paper and pens/markers/highlighters/colored pencils out to draw on.  Once someone finished a drawing, we would hang it on the big wall in our living area.  It started out as an accident: one of us left out some note cards and permanent markers one day and it turned into something really special, unique, and quite awesome.  We probably had over 50 different people contribute to the drawings and many people contributed multiple times.  It was a lot of fun to see how the drawings evolved.  They started out black and white (permanent marker and white note cards) and eventually we purchased a set of something like 30 colored markers to use.  People, in all states of mind at our parties (if you get what I mean), would draw with really no rules.  Though, we did start telling people we wanted more and more color as it went along.  No judgements, no mistakes - just simple fun.  I mean, how often do we get to just doodle and draw in college (minus the studio art majors, I guess)?  Many people surprised us with their talents!  One of my goals for winter break is to turn the drawings into a coffee table book of some kind -  though it will be difficult as these drawings are on papers of all shapes and sizes.  So, in an effort to use my tumblr more often I am going to start posting some of my favorite ones for your (and my) enjoyment.

This is what the wall looked like just before we took it down.  Props to my beautiful friend Kaylie for unknowingly (I think) posing in this picture!

One of my favorite memories of last year.

Also one of my favorite things from last year.  This semester was not the same without that apartment…proud to say I had at least 3 drawings on there haha

MY LIFE

(via carolofwords)

:-)

(via observabledifferences)

(via coffee4closers)

I just realized that I don’t tumble very often.  Mainly because I know that most of life consists of already being a vaguely hipster almost-twenty-something, and I don’t know how much more of that I can take before I grab some black-rimmed glasses to match my absurd amount of plaid shirts. I mean, I’m also sitting in a coffee shop typing this…so that’s a little ridiculous.

But I mean, I’ve spent a lot of time this last semester falling more into the stereotype that people have placed me in for years, and I’m actually so okay with that.  I used to push away from things that put me in a classification—a type—and now I just do whatever the fuck I want and it’s great.  I’ve never been happier, really, and I feel like that’s worth writing about.

Today is my final “hurdle” here at Millikin—yes, I know we’re hurdling all the time, fellow hurdlers—but today is the last real Right-Of-Passage we have to do as underclassman.  I’ve done Po Pro, the Open Scene, the Emily Monologue, “the” HURDLES, the Stretch Scene, and Rock Day.  That’s a lot of milestones for us to handle in our first two years here, but I mean, it taught us stuff.  Our professor told us to take the day to ourselves to make ourselves calm and relaxed…and here I am.

Coming to the end of all these milestones has made me the most reflective.  This semester has been bat shit crazy.  I went from being a total mess to being a total mess who is okay with it, and really the amount of progress I have made as a person this semester trumps the progress I have made as an actor, and I’m so okay with that.  I think they’ll balance out at some point.  It might be a while, but alas…whatever.

Change is terrifying.  It’s awful because it requires stepping into a place you either don’t understand, or a place you’re afraid to understand.  but letting it happen was literally the best—and only—thing I could have done if I wanted to live my life, and because of it (and through some really absurd coincidences) I am just really fucking happy. 

Life sucks a lot.  But I think the thing I have learned most is that when it does, something needs to change—and it won’t change unless you do something about it.  If you have something you want to say, say it.  Don’t wait until it’s too late, because you might miss the most important thing that could ever happen to you.  Staying unhappy isn’t worth it.  I did it for 19 years to the point where I convinced myself I was happy, but finding true happiness is something completely different. 

Walk outside your door, take a moment, and breathe.  Realize that in every micrometer around you, there is life.  Cells are dividing, reacting, on every surface of this planet.  Oxygen is flowing into your body.  Your heart is beating. 

Everything is ALIVE.

Don’t fight it.  Go live.  You’ll find that life is pretty okay.